alrite, back to this blog, it was 4 months away from the last one... i said i wish cynthia is still mine in my last blog, and yes...well... she is still mine, but we have gone thru a very though time in the last 4 months. We started the hard time on apr17, since then, out love burned out day by day, i was still hot with it but...her emotion..her i dunno wt...got stuck becuz of family issue; until now, i had no idea wt reli happened with her in swiss... i had more thoughts than wt she had told me... i dunno if i still believe in her but well... i am not secure now. altho she came back on june, and we got back tgt kinda like rite away, on june 30, but.... i think i took too much to leave her on may 27... i took all my energy to forget her...and yea.. my feeling has gone a bit... i dunno how to face her being cold again, i dun get scared easily now.. i dunno y im like that... i know i can get over her... but well i chose to be with her again and drown in this emotion... one day..i know.. may be i'll leave her again.. but i reli wish this time won't come.. haha she is leaving in a month time.. let's c wt happen again when i type here ..